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Old 06-12-2009, 07:06 AM   #1
amxguy1970
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What girls think they know about us

This was posted on SVT, got quite a kick out of it.

Read this article on AOL today..."Decoding a guy"


Quote:
Originally Posted by BS AOL Article

His Hands Are in His Pockets
Hands in his pockets looks relaxed, but it's anything but. Men tend to hide their hands when they're feeling uncomfortable, are hiding something or want to get away from a conversation.

He Holds Eye Contact When You Talk
Steady eye contact doesn't just mean that he's interested in what you're saying. It's a sign that he's incredibly attracted to you.

He Fidgets With Whatever's Around
Chatting up a guy? If he's holding anything in front of him -- a drink, his hands, a coat, a Golden Popcorn -- it's not a great sign. He's using those things as a barrier to prevent you from getting closer.

He Touches a Sensitive Spot
If a guy breaks the touch barrier, it's a sure sign of interest. But if he gets hands-on with a tender spot that's not generally exposed to the world (like your inner arm, wrist or neck), he's feeling close and connected with you on an emotional level as well.

He Rubs His Hands
If you're having a serious convo with a guy, scope out how nervous he is by checking out his hands. If he's touching or rubbing them a lot, you're making him anxious

He Seems French
No matter how long you've been together, a man that uses tons of tongue when he's kissing you is still totally turned on by you.

He Nuzzles Noggins
Leaning in so your heads touch? This guy's completely in love. Feeling connected enough to make cranial contact is a sure sign of emotional intimacy.

He's Giving You a Good-Bye Peck on the Cheek
Not sure if a new guy you're flirting with is into being just friends or something more? Sneak a peek at his hips when he smooches you. If they're angled away, he's not interested, but if they're pointed straight at you or bump against yours, you've got him hooked.

He Spreads Out
A wide stance means he's trying to show you how masculine he truly is. In other words, he's showing off and preening for you. (That, or he's in a men's restroom trolling for trouble.)

He Blocks His Words
Here's an easy way to spot a liar: If a guy is putting his hands in front of his mouth as he talks, he's likely not telling the truth.


Them women think they got us all figured out....do chicks buy into this crap?


Turrry's new and improved interpretations:


Quote:
Originally Posted by ME

His Hands Are in His Pockets
He's trying to hide the fact that for whatever reason, his dick is hard. If you are trying to seduce him, then take this as a compliment, drop to your knees and "thank" him properly.

He Holds Eye Contact When You Talk
He's lying, and trying to convince you that the blonde with the legs for days and the huge tits probably couldn't offer him the "love you can". Take this as sincerity cause it's the best you're gonna get.

He Fidgets With Whatever's Around
He's bored with the useless dribble you're spewing. More than likely he is desperate to go work on his car, play his xbox, or go work in the yard. Leave him alone for 10 seconds with silence and see if he doesn't get up and leave your uninteresting butt sitting on the couch.

He Touches a Sensitive Spot
He wants to make sex. Now. If this has been done in a area of the house such as the kitchen, bathroom, or hallway, then he wants it RIGHT then on the counter/floor/etc. Whatever is available, get ready to get balled cause it's coming.

He Rubs His Hands
He's probably examining the grease on his hands from before you nagged him to the point of taking you out to dinner, or on a date. He is wondering if he remembered to torque his head bolts properly or if they are just finger tight...and he's wondering when those parts he ordered will be here.

He Seems French
He wants to make sex. Don't fight him, it'll just turn him on more. Let him do what he wants, cause if you've been together for a while and he's taking the time to actually kiss you heavily and not go straight for penetration you are one of the lucky ones. Make sure you "thank him" later...

He Nuzzles Noggins
He is probably actually showing affection with this one...

He's Giving You a Good-Bye Peck on the Cheek
If it's a new relationship he's either too scared to go for it, or you are being a biatch and giving him mixed signals....he's trying his luck. Give him a CLEAR signal so that next time you get to the sex. If this is a good-bye deal, it's just that. A kiss. Quit reading into everything, this isnt a freaking harlequin novel, GET OUT OF OUR HEADS!!

He Spreads Out
His balls are sweaty or needed to be adjusted.

He Blocks His Words
Men have facial hair. It can itch. Don't be an oversensitive biatch and think we are lying because the stubble that is on our face from being up all night listening to you whine about your idiot friends itches us. Just listen to what we are saying for ONCE!!

Just thought I'd clear all that up for you ladies...
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Old 06-12-2009, 07:09 AM   #2
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Women are hilarious, and read WAY too much into everything, and think every little thing is about them.

Quote:
He Spreads Out
His balls are sweaty or needed to be adjusted.

Epic win!
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Old 06-12-2009, 07:10 AM   #3
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haha This was good.
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Old 06-12-2009, 07:11 AM   #4
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Old 06-12-2009, 07:19 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amxguy1970...View Post
He Spreads Out
His balls are sweaty or needed to be adjusted.

This is dead on. How could it be interpreted any other way?
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Old 06-12-2009, 07:25 AM   #6
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"He Seems French
He wants to make sex. Don't fight him, it'll just turn him on more. Let him do what he wants, cause if you've been together for a while and he's taking the time to actually kiss you heavily and not go straight for penetration you are one of the lucky ones. Make sure you "thank him" later..."

I am friggin' dying here.
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Old 06-12-2009, 07:28 AM   #7
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That above and this;

Quote:
He Rubs His Hands
He's probably examining the grease on his hands from before you nagged him to the point of taking you out to dinner, or on a date. He is wondering if he remembered to torque his head bolts properly or if they are just finger tight...and he's wondering when those parts he ordered will be here.

I can't tell you how many times I've thought about stuff like this while the Wife is babbling away about something (who knows what it was 'cause I wasn't listening).
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Old 06-12-2009, 07:50 AM   #8
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Lmao
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Old 06-12-2009, 07:53 AM   #9
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Love it.....lol
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Old 06-12-2009, 08:44 AM   #10
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that rocked...lol So true though...women read way to much inter everything...sorry ladies!
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Old 06-12-2009, 08:53 AM   #11
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Urs is more spot on, should send that in to the AOL Article or something...lol...

Joe
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Old 06-12-2009, 08:57 AM   #12
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You should send you version in to AOL, it's much better.
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Old 06-12-2009, 09:10 AM   #13
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That is great.
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Old 06-12-2009, 09:12 AM   #14
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More of this "dribble" shit.
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Old 06-12-2009, 09:16 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Doric...View Post
More of this "dribble" shit.

You expect too much from other people.
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Old 06-12-2009, 09:20 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sabraxas...View Post
You expect too much from other people.

I think I'm slowly coming to that realization.
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Old 06-12-2009, 09:42 AM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Doric...View Post
I think I'm slowly coming to that realization.

You should of come to it sooner.
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Old 06-12-2009, 09:51 AM   #18
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I see what you did there.
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Old 06-12-2009, 10:52 AM   #19
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My take

His Hands Are in His Pockets
He's trying to resist grabbing your boobs.

He Holds Eye Contact When You Talk
He likes you enough to not stare at your boobs, even though you're showing them off way too much and every other guy in the room is staring at them, licking their lips.

He Fidgets With Whatever's Around
He needs to pee.

He Touches a Sensitive Spot
He's probably into choking you while banging.

He Rubs His Hands
He's getting bored.

He Seems French
He's gay.

He Nuzzles Noggins
Ok I'll leave this one alone.

He's Giving You a Good-Bye Peck on the Cheek
Again, gay.

He Spreads Out
Other guy got it right. His balls are sweaty.

He Blocks His Words
Nearly vomited because you ugly!
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Old 06-12-2009, 11:00 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Douggo...View Post
You should of come to it sooner.

Subtle. Subtle, and classic.

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Old 06-12-2009, 11:44 AM   #21
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the ole' sweaty balls routine.

(I have a raised floor at worked - I can crack it up under my desk and get a nice cool shot right up my pant leg... i do this several times a day)
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